It’s only Tuesday, yep, the second working day of the week, and already I have been rejected by three, read that, THREE companies. I am starting to wonder if my last job didn’t do incredible and possibly irreversible damage to my CV, if only because people can’t seem to see beyond the bloody thing! I was there for less than three years, yet the 20 before it appear to have disappeared altogether (somehow).
Last Wednesday’s interviewer finally got back to me, and I can’t say that I wasn’t expecting it, because I sort of was, but it was the feedback that got me (something I had to write to them and request – of course). Apparently, they didn’t believe I would find the role “challenging enough.” Hmm, well, to be honest, give me dull and boring any day over “can’t afford to pay my bills or buy my food” but who am I to know what I would or wouldn’t feel about a job once it was offered?
Worry is burrowing a deep and burning path through my chest right at this moment. I have only applied for about 10 maybe 15 jobs over the last couple of weeks, several of them have already had a closing date pass and I have heard nothing so I can write them off, but others are reaching the point where I should start hearing, and I am scared I won’t hear a single word from any of them. This is starting to feel like a game where I am eternally washing my hair, but instead of “lather, rinse, repeat” it’s “apply, reject, repeat” over and over again until I am exhausted at the prospect of doing it.
I have to say that I was quite proud of myself. Though the rejection was like an unwelcome punch to the stomach (though when is a punch ever welcome?), I didn’t sit and cry, I just shrugged and went back to looking for more jobs that don’t appear to exist.
I am at a bit of a loss right now. I have exhausted all the roles that I have experience in, and that I don’t but wouldn’t mind getting experience in, and have been rejected by every single one of them. So where do I go now? Companies can’t seem to see past what is on my CV already, but when they meet me they tell me I am too experienced…so what the bloody hell am I meant to do now? I am champing at the bit to get back in the workplace, but have zero idea what exactly I am meant to be looking for. I don’t care (at all) what I end up doing…I could be shovelling shit in a stable, I really don’t care (I have given up on giving a shit) but I just can’t seem to find a company that will say “yep, we know you’ve got loads more experience but we’d be lucky to have you…”
I would like to think that someone would say “didn’t like her” or “came across as cocky” or “wouldn’t be able to work with her” if that was the case when it came down to their decision, but all I am getting is “over-qualified,” “too much experience,” “she’d get bored,” “not enough of a challenge.”
Seriously, does anyone have a map I could borrow? I am standing in the middle of a blacked-out city with zero clue about where I am meant to go next.